Just Sex, Or Something Much Better?

Get out of the gutter everyone!  This post is not about sex, it is about a kiss.

I have been watching sappy (yes, chick-flicks) movies since just before Christmas.  Maybe the loss of our older sister put me in the mood for memories, maybe it was just the time of year.  The problem is I can’t seem to shake them.  I think I may have figured out why.

When you kiss someone you care deeply for, how do you do it?  I am not talking about kissing your kid’s bye as you send them off to school, or kissing a family member when they come to visit.  I am talking about something much deeper here.

I started watching the movies to compare current kissing scenes to older film kissing scenes and found something very interesting.  Movies before about 1970 did not allow an open mouth (French kissing if you will) to be shown on film.  I watched An Affair to Remember a couple of times recently and that what where I first noticed this little factoid.


I know that they are actors and that this is what they do, but just look at the way they look at each other.  Obviously great actors because you can just feel what they are supposed to be feeling.  We have some older friends (I mean over the age of 50, but not over 100) that still look at each other this way.  I have caught their looks from time-to-time.  It’s a very personal thing, nothing you would flaunt in public, but also nothing to be ashamed of.  Simple.  Emotional.  Loving.  To me, this is not a sexy look and thus requires a non-sexual type of kiss.

Then I was watching the new Jumanji movie kiss scene:



Now, to be fair, I have to give the actors credit because they truly looked like “first-time” kissers – GREAT JOB!  But it was also sad at the same time for me.  They had the belief in their heads that an open mouth, coming at someone like you are a Brain Sucker about to vacuum their brains through their mouth, full force entry was supposed to be the best kind of kiss – what?  Later in the movie, they return to teenager mode and appear to do it much better.

The kisses of yesteryear seem to be so much more than the kisses of today.  Not that all movie kissing is bad, just that not a lot of it is good.  There was a real connection in those older kisses.  You felt like the whole person, not just the mouth, was completely absorbed in the act.  It was so much more than a simple lead into a sexual urge.

Please don’t misunderstand – I love sex.  I am just saying that this form of kissing speaks worlds more to me than the act of sex.  I have had some great partners, some good kissers, and some real stinkers.  I can only remember three guys that kissed me like this – one, unfortunately, is now in heaven.  Kissing angels I am sure.  I have no clue where the other two are, but the kisses were so great that they linger in my memory still today.

In case you are wondering – no, I am not married.  Actually, I have been engaged three times and when the last one (the one kissing angels) died of a sudden heart attack on me; I took that as a sign.  I was not meant to be married.  It’s just not in my cards (look it up youngsters, it is an old phrase).  I believe I was put here to help others, not myself.

So, I guess I will just have to be satisfied with my dreams of a perfect kiss.  I have no prospects of obtaining one, but I am OK with that.  There are so many more things to life to experience, and I have a learner’s heart.  Learning new things will continue to be my friend and my dreams will have to be satisfied with memories of what that great kiss is.


(Name this movie!)

You can also check me out at:  www.helbergfarmstories.com for fun stories from our farm.

Follow my blog with Bloglovin


2 thoughts on “Just Sex, Or Something Much Better?

  1. Very interesting post. My husband and I watch a lot of movies (especially this time of year when the weather is not conducive for our beloved outdoor work), but we also spend quite a bit of time afterward discussing and analyzing. I have to say we’ve never analyzed kissing!

    I have to say that I absolutely agree with you. I would say that the sex-related scenes of modern movies are emotionally sterile. And the more they show, the less intriguing the scene becomes. That old saying, “less is more” is absolutely true.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.